How to Shenanigans
by Sir Dolan Death-with-Benefits
Summary: AU! Lapis travels to a different universe to attend a college to learn all there is to learn about Pokémon. She spends her days at college learning how to shenanigan among the strange students and teachers from a different universe.


**Chapter Summary:** It's the week before term starts and the students are settling in their new dorms. Will Lapis like her roommate, and how does she react meeting her potential new 'friends'?

**Warning:** AU! Multiple relationships, CRACK, Violence, Language, Lemons and lime, Basically just the characters of Pokémon from the anime and games messing around at college, Deliberate OoC-ness most of the time, OC POV, Endless parties, Fuck it let's just rate it M now.

**Other Genres:** Romance, Drama, Friendship, probably some Horror, most likely some Angst, probably some Hurt/Comfort.

**Disclaimer:** I do not own any of the characters from Pokémon, only the universe and Lapis.

**Notables:** Students here are ages 16-25. Legal age of sex is 16. Legal age to drink in public is 18. Legal age to drive is 17.

**A/N:** It has begun… -insert dramatic music here- I have a feeling this story is going to be absolutely ridiculous. I have so many plans for this it's unreal. I got the idea to do this from the stories 'Confessions' and 'Chronicles of Max' written by my wonderful sister Kinkajouu! *cough*Goreadherfanfiction*cough*

This story isn't going to be written in a diary style, but it will be in Lapis' POV and it will be present tense. I hope you enjoy and feel free to leave a review! :D

* * *

Chapter 1: Welcome to endless parties and skipping classes

Hello. If you didn't already know from the summery, my name is Lapis. I've just started at the College of Pokémon, and I'm not going to lie, it was a real pain to get here. Travelling into a different universe isn't easy, you know. Sadly, I'm the only one from my universe to come here. None of my friends would come with me no matter how much I begged them, so here I am, standing in the middle of the college courtyard with no friends.

We have approximately five days until term starts and I've already unpacked. It took me by surprise how little I actually have when I was packing back in my own universe. This now leaves me with absolutely nothing to do for the next five days. I've tried waiting in my dorm room for my roommate, but she hasn't appeared yet. Apparently students are still travelling to get here.

As you can see, I got bored with waiting and now I'm exploring the grounds of the college. This place is HUGE. I'm actually afraid of getting lost, so I'm making sure that my dorm is within my range of sight.

I passed a few students here and there. Out of all of them, I only saw one who had relatively normal hair colour or style. I feel out of place with my normal straight brunette style, man. I saw these three guys earlier – I think they were brothers, I'm not entirely sure – and one had green hair, the second had red, and the last had blue. It's like they dyed their hair to match the types grass, fire water.

Oh wait.

I'm literally knocked out of my thoughts and onto the ground when I bump into someone. I didn't even realise I had started walking in the first place. I really need to stop walking when I'm thinking.

"I'm so sorry! Are you okay?" a voice asks me in a worried tone.

I look up and my eyes widen. A girl looking about my age stands in front of me with a concerned expression. I almost grin in relief when I see she has relatively normal pale brown hair.

"Do you want some help?" she asks.

I shake my head and stand up on my own before stupidly blurting out, "You're normal."

_Great going, dipshit._

"P-pardon?" the girl says obviously confused.

"Sorry," I laugh awkwardly, "it's just that I've walked past quite a few people with _really_ odd hairstyles."

"Oh, I see. There are quite a few people here with abnormal hair styles." She sighs. "I don't understand how their genetics work."

"Wait, they're _born_ with those colours?"

"Of course, are you new here?"

"I'm from a completely different universe."

"Oh." The girl pauses. "My names Leaf, what's yours?"

Did she really just ignore the fact that I'm from a different universe? "I'm Lapis, pleased to bump into you."

Leaf laughs at that. "I need to introduce you to my friends. They're going to love you!" she pauses again to frown. "Well, Green might try to flirt with you and Red will most likely say nothing."

Apparently, yes was the answer to my universe question. "They sound like interesting friends."

"Interesting is certainly the word for them. Anyway, I have to go. I'll talk to you later, Lapis!"

"Talk to you later." I reply back and wave as Leaf turns to walk around the corner of a building.

I immediately realise I'm alone again.

And I have no idea where I am.

I can't see my dorm. How bloody far did I walk while I was thinking? Eh, it doesn't matter. I have five days to find my way back.

I wander around the college grounds some more, keeping a look out for my dorm when I finally stumble across the canteen. I decide to head inside and take a look at who is in there. The three brothers from earlier sitting at the long high tables against the wall, a guy with long red hair sitting at the table nearest to the cash register, a girl with pink hair who is drinking a carton of milk, and a girl with outrageous purple hair sitting with her who…has a dragon plushie.

What is it with these people and their fucking abnormal hair colour?

I decide against getting anything from the canteen before walking back outside. Now what? Explore a bit more? Go and try to bump into someone else who looks relatively normal? Try and set something on fire – oh, there's my dorm.

Instead of burning something like I'm insanely tempted to do, I make my way back to my dorm to see if my roommate has turned up yet. On the way there I pass two very attractive women – I'm calling them women because of their bra size, sue me – and I swear the black-haired one is a model. You're only _born_ with beauty like that. I try not to stare as I walk past, but Beauty-Model just has to look at me and smile. I feel my face burn and I smile back awkwardly. The rednette looks between us and frowns.

"Hi." Beauty-Model says.

"H-hi…" I reply somewhat – not shyly – quietly.

They walk past me and I hear the red-haired girl say, "Who was that, Elesa?"

"How should I know?" Elesa – _mm, nice name_ – replies. "I was just being polite. She seems like a nice girl."

I hear the other girl say something else and they both laugh as I enter my dorm. I quickly turn the corner and peak out to watch the black-haired beauty leave the dorm gardens. I lean against the wall and fist bump the air, hitting my elbow against the wall in the process. Despite the numbing pain in my arm, I'm so fucking ecstatic right now. I seem like a nice girl! _I seem like a nice girl!_ I'm so giddy with happiness right now! She approved of me! I sit against the wall and sigh with a stupid smile.

"Uh, hey?"

I look up once again at someone who looks relatively normal. "Hey?"

The raven-haired boy frowns. "Are you okay down there?"

"Yep, just fine," I say with a grin.

"Do you want to get up?"

"Probably," I stand up and rub my elbow tenderly, "who are you?"

"Cheren," he pushes his glasses up the bridge of his nose, "and you are?"

"Lapis,"

"I see." Cheren frowns again. "You haven't happened to have seen a girl called Bianca, have you? She has blonde hair and she's wearing a big green hat."

"No, sorry,"

"Ah, damn. Well, thanks anyway. If you see her can you let her know I'm looking for her?"

"Yeah, I will."

"Thanks." And with that raven-head walks off.

That was certainly…interesting. Anyway, what was I doing? Oh yes. I was going to see if my roommate has finally turned up.

I walk up the stairs to my floor and find the door to my room. I turn the handle and to my surprise it's already unlocked. So my roommate has _finally_ turned up! I step inside, my side of the room neatly organised from the unpacking (that'll change next week) while my roommate's side is _already_ messy and unorganised. My eyes widen when I see a blonde girl with a strange, green hat messing about in her…_fourth_ suitcase? Okay, seriously, what the fuck? You don't need that much stuff! We're only living at college temporarily. Hell, you could probably go home whenever you want; this is _your_ God-damn universe!

Wait. Blonde hair. Green hat. Blonde hair plus green hat equals Bianca, right? _This_ was the Bianca that Cheren kid was looking for? Huh. Who would have thought these two were friends?

"Hello?" I say.

Bianca lets out a startled 'eep' and turns around to face me. Her face breaks into a wide grin, and before I even have time to react she pulls me into a back breaking hug.

"Oh! So _you're_ my roommate! It's a pleasure to meet you!" She pulls away and tilts her hat down as a sign of greeting, I think? "I'm Bianca!"

Something tells me I'm not going to enjoy this. "I'm Lapis, pleased to meet you too?" That wasn't meant to sound like a question.

"Oh, I'm so excited! This is going to be so much fun!" Bianca squeals and gasps. "I need to finish packing!"

"Um…have much stuff do you have?" I ask as she turns to mess around with her suitcase again.

"I have everything from my house. I'm going to be _living_ here after all!"

"Y-you don't need _everything_ you know…"

"Huh? But we're living here."

"Yes. Temporarily,"

"Oh." Bianca tilts her head to the side before turning to me. "In that case, I'm done packing. Let's go explore! Please, Lapis!"

"Wait, what?" Oh no, I'm done with my exploring today, thank you very much.

"It'll be so much fun!" she exclaims with bubbling excitement. "We'll get to see what the college has to offer, and we'll get to meet our new potential friends! Doesn't that sound like fun?"

The sound of running into Elesa again is tempting, but the urge to pull out my laptop and game is more tempting right now. Wait, didn't Cheren ask me to do something?

"I'm not in the mood for it right now." I say apologetically. "Also, a guy called 'Cheren' was looking for you earlier."

"H-he was?" Bianca's eyes widen. "I need to go find him! Thanks, Lapis!"

I watch as the unorganised blonde rushes out of the room. Once again, I realise I'm alone, so what do I do? I get out my laptop and game.

And that is what I do for the rest of the day.

* * *

I wake up in the middle of the night. I open my eyes and it's completely dark. Who shut the fucking curtains? Oh, wait, that was me.

Anyway, the reason why I woke up was because a certain blonde-haired, green-eyed girl giggled. At least I think she giggled. I glance over at her bed and squint to see a faint light from under her covers. What was she even doing? I quietly pull my phone from under my pillow and press a button to check the time. After blinding myself, I see that it's about three in the morning.

Another giggle soon erupts.

"Bianca…" I groan.

I hear her gasp. "S-sorry…! Did I wake you…?"

"Yes, now go to sleep…" I hiss back before turning over.

"Sorry…" she whispers back and I notice her side of the room grow darker.

This is going to be a long term…

* * *

Over the next couple of days all of the students have arrived. I've spent my time either sitting in my room gaming or exploring the college grounds. It's now the third day, or rather the third morning and I've come downstairs to mayhem.

Our kitchen is a mess. I'm not over exaggerating either. There's flour everywhere, and I'm pretty sure that's tomato ketchup on the floor by the fridge. Bianca appears behind me and I look back at her with narrowed eyes. She gapes at the kitchen.

"We're finding out who did this." I say sternly.

"I-I'll go get Cheren!" She announces before running off.

I sigh and shake my head. I'm going to kill whoever the fuck thought this was funny.

"Whoa, what happened in here?" I turn around to see the rednette who was walking with Elesa a couple of days before.

_Very_ small excitement builds in my stomach at the chance that I could be seeing her. "I don't know. I came down with my roommate just now, and we've found it like this."

"I bet it was Ash and Cameron."

"Who are they?"

"A couple of idiots who always compete against each other." The rednette sighs. "We've had the displeasure of having them in our dorm."

"I'm going to kill them."

"I might join you. What's your name?"

"I'm Lapis, you?"

"I'm Skyla. The girl I was with a couple of days ago is my roommate, Elesa." Skyla looks back at the door. "She should be coming down in a minute."

I almost smile at that. My almost smile immediately disappears when I hear Bianca's voice getting closer to the kitchen. Finally, both Bianca and Cheren enter the kitchen and the raven-head's eyes widen.

"I thought you were being overdramatic, Bianca. Who did this?" Cheren demands.

"It was Morty and Roark." Another voice says and we all turn to see Elesa standing there in her beauty. "They had a few too many to drink last night. They'll be cleaning it up when their hangovers have died down a little. They've both pulled out of their wallets and given me enough money to get us breakfast. Who's in?"

"I am, definitely!" Skyla exclaims.

"R-really, are you sure?" Bianca asks hesitantly before squealing when Elesa nods. "Alright, I'm in!"

"May as well." Cheren shrugs.

After a moment of contemplation I nod. "Sure, count me in. But, uh, what about the rest of the dorm?"

"They've already gone ahead for their breakfast. We're the last ones to go besides the two hung-over idiots."

"Well, what are we waiting for?" Skyla asks impatiently. "Let's go grab some breakfast! Free food tastes better than non-free food any day!"

We make our way over to the canteen in small dorm pack. It's almost like we're all friends, except I'm the odd one out. While I _may_ have made a friend in Bianca, she's busy talking to Cheren, and Elesa is talking to Skyla.

Well, Elesa _was_ talking to Skyla. She's turned to me now.

"So, Lapis," she starts and I frown in wonder at how she knows my name. And then I notice Skyla grinning, "I heard you were planning on killing whoever messed up the kitchen."

I feel my cheeks warm up with embarrassment. "If they clean it up properly, I'll let it slide."

Elesa laughs at that and I feel a giddy happiness settle.

"Where are you from, then?"

"A different universe,"

She raises an eyebrow at me. "I see." Seriously, you're not going to react either?

"Where are you from?"

"A place called Unova, same as these three."

"Unova, it sounds like a nice place." I comment.

Elesa smiles in return. "It is."

We finally arrive at the canteen to see that it's busier that it was a couple of days ago. I follow my dorm mates inside, and as we make our way to the food I notice Leaf sitting at a table with two other boys. She sees me and waves at me. Like the polite person that I am, I wave back. Like the polite person that I am, I send a glare to the green-eyed kid who winks at me. I'm guessing _he's_ Green.

"What are you having, Lapis?" Bianca asks me, curving my attention away from sending glares at Leaf's friend.

"Uh, a bacon sandwich and a tea, I guess."

"Got it, let's get our drinks first. Is that okay, Elesa?"

Said blacknette nods. "Go for it."

We shuffle to the machine that makes the hot drinks and make what we want before shuffling back to everyone else. After a few more minutes of grabbing our food and waiting in the queue to pay, we finally sit down at a table to eat. Well, Cheren decides to eat with someone else. As we eat our breakfast, a light conversation settles around the table. I try my best not to look at Elesa too much. She probably already thinks I'm a weirdo with the whole kitchen killing thing.

As we're eating I'm pretty sure one of the triplet brothers is playing with fire. The one with red hair has been flicking that lighter on and off for the past fifteen minutes. His brothers look awful nervous; surely he isn't _that_ dangerous with a lighter.

"We're going back." Elesa announces as she and Skyla stand up. "We need to make sure Morty and Roark don't break the kitchen with their hangover. You two enjoy your breakfast."

"See you later!" Skyla chirps before following Elesa out of the canteen. I scowl into her back for being her roommate.

"Lapis, while we're here why don't I introduce you to my friends?" Bianca suggests.

"I've already met Cheren." I point out before realising how _rude_ that sounded.

Bianca doesn't seem to care though. "I know, but you haven't met our other friends yet. They're twins."

"Okay, I just need some air first." I say. "Do you mind?"

"Nope, I'll wave to you when you come back in."

I nod and finish the rest of my bacon sandwich before grabbing my tea and heading outside. I take a deep breath before sighing. It's only been three days and one room in our dorm is already wrecked by drunken dorm mates. And I'm pretty sure I heard some murmurs about a party being held at some point from people in there. And _then_ there's skipping classes and lectures when it suits you. Yup, welcome to college, Lapis!

I look back down in time to see a bright flash blind my sight. I cry out in pain and drop my tea to cover my eyes.

"Bloody hell, what the fuck was that for?!" I curse as I try to glare at the idiot despite the bright dots in my sight.

"I was taking a picture of your eyes. It's not my fault you looked down just as I took it."

As the bright dots clear from my sight I finally see a boy about my age with dirty blonde hair standing in front of me. In his hand is the offending object – or simply known as a camera – that blinded me in the first place.

"Don't you know you're supposed to _ask_ before taking a picture of someone?" I almost growl.

"Are they real?" he asks, completely ignoring my question.

"What?"

"Your eyes, are they real?"

"Of course they're real, you idiot."

"They're silver."

"What does that-?"

My question is cut off when an explosion takes place behind us in the canteen. I turn around to see smoke clouding the inside of the canteen with tables and chairs toppled over. I can see students staggering around in panicked confusion.

I glance back at Camera-Boy and we dash into the smoke. After much confusion, screaming and shouting, the smoke finally fades and we've caused so much devastation that both the teachers and the head teachers have come down to see what we've done. After another ten minutes of getting told off, we're all sent back to our dorms for the rest of the day. We've practically been grounded.

When we all return back at the dorm the first person we run into is Skyla.

"Why is everyone back?" She asks before frowning at our sheepish, guilty expressions. "What did you all do?"

* * *

The next evening I'm just casually sitting on my bed with my laptop when Bianca bursts through our door. I watch her gasp for breath with amusement.

"L-Lapis…" she wheezes, "we…have to get ready…"

"Ready for what exactly?" I ask as I direct my attention back to my laptop.

"There's going to be a party in two hours!" She exclaims excitedly. "And that means we only have two hours to get ready!"

I glance at the time to see its half past six. So that means the party won't finish until midnight. I've got better things to do than watch a bunch of college students get drunk and taunt me for not being able to get drunk with them.

"You do know that these parties are going to be completely different to school discos, right?" Bianca tilts her head innocently. "People are going to be getting smashed."

"I know that." She blinks. "Are you jealous of the older students being able to drink at the party?"

"I could hardly care less. I'm just not in the mood to hang around with a bunch of drunks. Besides, remember what Morty and Roark did to the kitchen when they were drunk? Imagine that, but with about twenty more students." As I think about it I haven't actually met those idiots yet.

"But it'll be so much fun!" Bianca continues to whine. "You haven't made any new friends since me, anyway."

I managed to stop myself from saying, "Since when have we been friends?" But as I think about it, I may have accidentally befriended the clumsy blonde.

Instead I sigh and frown at my laptop screen. "If I say yes, will you stop whining to me about it?"

"I promise!"

"Fine…"

"Yes! This is going to be so much fun! Get off your laptop and let's get ready!"

As Bianca flutters around trying to find her party clothes, I stay on my laptop for another good hour before finally deciding to get ready.

* * *

This was a bad idea.

This was _such_ a bad idea. Why did I let Bianca talk me into this again? Oh yes, so she could stop whining about me not having any friends.

Well, I'd rather not have any friends than face the masses of drunken college students.

I don't know how the teachers have allowed this party. Hell, they probably didn't and the idiots _still_ set it up anyway.

It's only twenty-to-nine and people are already drunk in the bar. Are those bartenders even being paid for supervising this party that shouldn't even be taking place? I'm also wondering who decorated the place as well, because it's like they simply put dance floors everywhere with disco balls on every ceiling.

I glance at Bianca who is practically bristling with excitement and I notice Cheren isn't with her. When I ask she laughs sheepishly.

"He, uh, isn't very good at parties. He had a bad experience at one a year or so ago."

"Who doesn't?" I ask rhetorically before making my way to the bar with the blonde in tow.

We buy two lemonades and sit in a calm corner next to a couple snogging the life out of each other. While I try to ignore them, I see Bianca looking at them longingly out of the corner of my eye. After five minutes of loud music, drunken dancing and Bianca staring at the couple making out, I finally elbow her and give her a look that says, 'stop-staring-at-them-like-a-weirdo'. She simply pulls out her puppy dog eyes at me and I shake my head.

"We should dance with everyone else." The blonde suggests.

"And who would look after our drinks?" I ask.

"They'll still be here when we get back, come on!"

"I'm not having someone potentially drug me, Bianca."

"Fine, let's finish our drinks first and _then_ dance."

I'm literally face-palming right now.

After finishing our drinks – and sounding like we have water balloons for stomachs – I follow Bianca as she makes her way to two very similar looking brunettes. Bianca wasn't kidding; these two are almost identical despite being brother and sister. If they were both dressed as girls with the same hair style and the same eye colour I wouldn't be able to tell the difference.

"Lapis, I'd like to introduce you to my best friends!" She shouts over the music. "This is Touko," she gestures to the girl, "and this is Touya!" She then gestures to the boy.

And that is how I met Bianca's 'best friends'. Needless to say, I'm not sure if it's the best or worst thing to happen in my life.

As the night wears on I get to know both Touko and Touya in the breaks between dancing and making fools of ourselves. Around about eleven Touko gets us all lemonade as we take a relatively long break from dancing. I see Touya looking nervous, but before I have the chance to ask him what's wrong, Touko comes back with our drinks. We toast our drinks before taking one gulp.

One gulp was all I needed to realise there's vodka in our drinks. I send a glare Touko's way who only grins cheekily and takes another sip of her drink. How on Earth did she even get these?

"Touko, what the hell?" I say as the music dies down, getting ready for the next song.

"It's the very first party at college. Of _course_ we're gonna drink alcohol!" The brunette pouts. "Come on, we won't get too drunk. I promise."

And then both Touko and Bianca give me the puppy dog eyes. I glance at Touya who looks like he's thinking the same as me: we're so fucked.

* * *

We won't get too drunk she said. What a load of bullshit. I'm so drunk right now I'm dancing on a table with Touko singing 'The Fox'. I'm pretty sure everyone else here are drunk as well. A small fire has started in the corner of the bar – most likely by that guy or caused the fire in the canteen – and a white-haired girl is standing on the stage playing on her guitar rather violently.

I have no idea what happens after that. I remember everyone running outside howling, and then me, Bianca, Touko and Touya staggering back to our dorms.

I think this is my bed. Fuck it. I'm going to sleep

Good night.

* * *

I have the mother of all headaches. Why the fuck did I let Touko coax me into drinking? Why did I dance on a table singing 'The Fox' and making weird fox noises that probably were nothing like the actual sound of fox noises.

Why did I let them corrupt me?

Welcome to college, Lapis.

* * *

Lapis is bisexual before anyone asks. Now that I think about it, her saying "pleased to bump into you" could be seen as a pick-up line.

Lapis has tried hitting on Leaf without me even realising it…

I practically have the whole 'friendship group' planned out. If you wanna leave suggestions for what Lapis and her friends get up to, you're more than welcome to. :P

Dolan


End file.
